If you’re the kind of clueless person who thinks running a gas-powered generator inside your house or garage during a blackout is a cute idea, congratulations—you’re about five seconds away from becoming another Darwin Award statistic. I don’t care if you survive or not. But for the tiny fraction of you with a shred of common sense, I’m going to lay down some brutal truths about generator safety during extended power outages. You’re welcome in advance.

First things first: generators are not toys. They are fire-breathing, fuel-guzzling machines that will kill you faster than a stampeding herd of zombies if you don’t treat them with the respect they deserve. This is especially true when the grid goes down for days—or weeks. People think they can just throw a generator in the corner of the garage, crank it up, and watch their lights come back on like nothing happened. That’s how people die. Let me be crystal clear: never, ever, under any circumstances, operate a generator indoors or in an enclosed space.

Carbon monoxide doesn’t care about your feelings. It doesn’t care that you’re trying to binge-watch TV while the rest of the neighborhood is in darkness. It’s a silent killer. The moment you inhale it, your brain gets robbed of oxygen. You collapse. You die. Your family probably does too, and the paramedics? Good luck—they won’t make it in time if the outage is widespread. So if you think it’s okay to run a generator in your basement, just do everyone a favor and stay in the house. Alone. Forever.

Now that we’ve cleared that up, let’s talk placement. Generators need to breathe. They need fresh air. They need space. Put them outside, at least 20 feet from your house, doors, and windows. Not 15. Not 19. Twenty. And make sure the exhaust is pointing away from any living area. Think of it like a dragon: you wouldn’t put a dragon in your living room and expect your furniture to survive. Treat your generator the same way.

Fuel storage is another topic that seems to blow the minds of every amateur prepper. Gasoline is a volatile, flammable nightmare waiting to explode, and somehow people think it’s fine to store five gallons in the kitchen. No. Just no. Use approved fuel containers, keep them outside, and never store them near an open flame—or your generator. And don’t even get me started on running a generator with an empty tank. These machines don’t just quit politely—they sputter, backfire, and sometimes throw flames. Keep fuel levels consistent, and refuel only when the generator is off and cooled down.

Extension cords. Yes, those flimsy pieces of crap you think are fine for a few hours of use. They’re not. If your extension cord isn’t rated for the load you’re putting on it, you might as well be lighting your house on fire yourself. Invest in heavy-duty, grounded cords. Don’t cheap out. You want to light your house with electricity, not fire. Period.

Load management is another area where people fail miserably. A generator has limits, and exceeding them is a fast track to disaster. Don’t even think about powering your entire house unless you have a monster generator designed for it. Start with essential appliances: refrigerator, freezer, a few lights, and maybe a sump pump if you live somewhere wet. Everything else can wait—or burn. You need to know what your generator can handle, and do not push it beyond its rated capacity. Overload it, and you’ll either destroy the generator or electrocute yourself. And I don’t care which happens—you won’t survive either scenario if you’re unlucky.

Maintenance is another thing people ignore until it’s too late. A generator sitting in the corner of your shed is useless if it won’t start when everything goes dark. Change the oil, clean the air filter, check the spark plug, and inspect fuel lines. Treat your generator like a war machine, because in a long-term power outage, that’s exactly what it is. A dead generator is as useful as a cardboard box filled with hope.

Noise. Yes, generators are loud. Too bad. This isn’t a spa. If someone complains, punch them. Or better yet, keep the generator as far away from neighbors as possible—because if the world has gone to hell, the last thing you need is some entitled Karen whining about noise while you’re trying to survive.

There’s one more thing most people don’t consider: security. A generator is a juicy target for looters during prolonged outages. Don’t leave it lying around like a shiny toy. Lock it up if possible, or at least make it difficult for thieves to carry it away. The last thing you need is to survive a week without power, only to have your generator stolen. If you live in a high-risk area, a chain and padlock might just save your life—or at least your ability to refrigerate that leftover food.

And for the love of whatever deity you pretend to follow, know how to operate your generator before the lights go out. Read the manual. Know the controls. Understand how to shut it down quickly in an emergency. Ignorance is not bliss—it’s a ticket to the morgue.

Let’s sum this up, because I know some of you morons need everything spelled out. Here’s the brutal checklist for surviving a prolonged power outage with a generator:

1. Outdoor placement only – Minimum 20 feet from structures, exhaust away from living spaces.
2. Never indoors – Basements, garages, or any enclosed areas are death traps.
3. Safe fuel storage – Approved containers, outside, away from flames, generator off and cooled before refueling.
4. Heavy-duty cords – Rated for the load, grounded, don’t cheap out.
5. Load management – Only run essential appliances, never exceed rated capacity.
6. Regular maintenance – Oil changes, air filter cleaning, spark plug inspection, fuel line checks.
7. Noise tolerance – Loud is unavoidable, so deal with it.
8. Security measures – Lock it up or secure it to prevent theft.
9. Know the machine – Learn operation and emergency shutdown before the blackout.
10. Carbon monoxide vigilance – If you smell exhaust, evacuate. Do not test your luck.

Take this seriously, because I don’t care about your excuses. In the end, survival isn’t about luck—it’s about preparation, smarts, and being ruthless enough to follow the rules while everyone else screws up. If you fail to respect your generator, the world will make a swift decision about your survival—and spoiler alert: it won’t be kind.

Generators are a lifeline in a SHTF scenario, but they’re also lethal weapons if mishandled. Handle them with respect. Follow the rules. Don’t be an idiot. And if you do die because you thought running a generator in your basement was a good idea… well, don’t say I didn’t warn you.